PUA Openers

The best openers, stories, and banter lines collected from the world's greatest PUAs.

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The Pimp Daddy Routine

I saw two people sitting next to each other in a bar, a man and a woman. it was obvious that both were interested in each other, but neither was going to do anything about it. so I go up to the man and tell him that he should kiss her on the cheek. well, […]

 

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Short Girls Opener

You’re the Tiny Dangerous one here! Gotta watch out for you. – By Brad P Related From Amazon The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book) In an easy language Toltec Wisdom Book This product will be an excellent pick for you (as of December 9, 2023 02:24 GMT -05:00 […]

 

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The Phone or Text Opener

UA: Hey guys, phone or text? HBS: What? PUA: If you gave a guy your number, initially, would you prefer him to phone or text you? HB1: Ooohh, I dunno, text I think HB2: Noooo, phone, it’s more personal PUA: OMG, I’m confused now! You guys are like the View! HBs: Blah blah PUA: I’m […]

 

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Matchstick Magic Trick

Like any good bar bet, this one starts off sounding impossible: Bet that you can toss a paper match into the air and make it land on its side. Note: This won’t work with wooden matches. Invite your audience to try it first. Unless they know the trick, they’ll never be able to make it […]

 

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Mannequin Routine

So the most embarrassing thing happened the other day. I was in this department store with some friends to buy some new shoes… and someone had said something so funny that we were just killing ourselves laughing… and I wasn’t watching where I was going and like… tripped over this mannequin. Like I fell right […]

 

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Who Lies More Opener

PUA: Hey guys, on a scale of one to ten… Who lies more…men or women? HBs: [girls talk for a bit, then you cut them off] PUA: Ok, but who CHEATS more, guys or girls? HBs: [girls talk for a bit, then you cut them off] PUA: I was waiting to get a haircut a […]

 

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Alien Beauty Routine

PUA: You have a very other worldly beauty. HB: Oh, so your saying I look like an alien? PUA: Yes. Yes, I am. Actually, I was hired by the government to find you. They said you escaped the lab. How’s you manage that? Maybe you can be my friend, like ET and I’ll hide you […]

 

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Gay Cats Routine

Initial hook: Start the story with, “Have you ever met a gay cat?” PUA: Ok, get this, my friend Sara, bought 3 cats some time ago. I don’t know what she was thinking when she bought them, but she bought all three *male* cats. It was so funny. When I would go to her place […]

 

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Mystery’s Seashell Opener

Mystery: [pulling a seashell from his pocket and holding it out in his open palm] Hey look at this. … Isn’t this awesome? … Isn’t it pretty? … Yeah my friends and I … went down to Santa Monica pier… and we found THIS… and it’s a KEEPSAKE. … Isn’t it pretty? – Mystery Related […]

 

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80s Music Opener

PUA: Hey guys, this is driving us nuts, you know that song… “You spin me right round baby right round like a record baby right round round round…” Who sings that? Girls: [as they start to respond interrupt them and continue] PUA: I was talking to my friend the other day and she said it’s […]

 

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