PUA Openers

The best openers, stories, and banter lines collected from the world's greatest PUAs.

The Five Dollar Kiss Gambit

If you target starts throwing you a lot of interest, you throw a disqualifier like “OMG don’t even start with me. I’m totally not in that headspace right now. Besides I’m in a bit of a contest with my friend right now. The rules are (listen carefully), I have to pay my buddy $5 for any girl that I kiss tonight. And if a girl starts talking to me and I DON’T kiss her, then he has to pay ME $5.”

If they ask you any follow up questions about the contest, explain with: “Well my buddy always gives me shit because every time he turns around I’m making out with some girl I just met while we’re just supposed to be out with the gang having fun. And I dunno, I’m just a social person. I’ll just start talking to random people no matter where I am. [You can go into the People Are Anti-social Routine here for some multi-threading]. But anyway, my buddy’s always giving me shit for being a bit of a man-whore, so we made the bet so I could show him that I can actually carry on a conversation without kissing somebody. So if you guys wanna make me rich tonight: no kissing!”

If she asks at any point if it matters where you kiss, say “Oh, it only counts on the lips. I kiss everyone on the cheek as a habit anyway. So if it was on the cheek, I’d be broke in like a week!”

If she does want to kiss you, or if she asks you how much you’ve paid out or been paid tonight, you look a little embarassed and say “Yeah….we’re not going there. The question is: is YOUR kiss worth $5?”

If more than one girl wants to kiss you, you can kiss them all and then say “OMG you girls must think I’m an ATM tonight!”

Originally by L.A. Tripp, expanded upon by Prophet

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