PUA Openers

The best openers, stories, and banter lines collected from the world's greatest PUAs.

Pick Up Lines and Routines

The Pimp Daddy Routine

I saw two people sitting next to each other in a bar, a man and a woman. it was obvious that both were interested in each other, but neither was going to do anything about it. so I go up to the man and tell him that he should kiss her on the cheek. well, […]

 

Short Girls Opener

You’re the Tiny Dangerous one here! Gotta watch out for you. – By Brad P Related From Amazon Badass Affirmations: The Wit and Wisdom of Wild Women (Inspirational Quotes for Women, Book Gift for Women, Powerful Affirmations) (as of December 2, 2022 15:15 GMT -05:00 – More infoProduct prices and availability are accurate as of […]

 

The Phone or Text Opener

UA: Hey guys, phone or text? HBS: What? PUA: If you gave a guy your number, initially, would you prefer him to phone or text you? HB1: Ooohh, I dunno, text I think HB2: Noooo, phone, it’s more personal PUA: OMG, I’m confused now! You guys are like the View! HBs: Blah blah PUA: I’m […]

 

Matchstick Magic Trick

Like any good bar bet, this one starts off sounding impossible: Bet that you can toss a paper match into the air and make it land on its side. Note: This won’t work with wooden matches. Invite your audience to try it first. Unless they know the trick, they’ll never be able to make it […]

 

Mannequin Routine

So the most embarrassing thing happened the other day. I was in this department store with some friends to buy some new shoes… and someone had said something so funny that we were just killing ourselves laughing… and I wasn’t watching where I was going and like… tripped over this mannequin. Like I fell right […]

 

Who Lies More Opener

PUA: Hey guys, on a scale of one to ten… Who lies more…men or women? HBs: [girls talk for a bit, then you cut them off] PUA: Ok, but who CHEATS more, guys or girls? HBs: [girls talk for a bit, then you cut them off] PUA: I was waiting to get a haircut a […]

 

Alien Beauty Routine

PUA: You have a very other worldly beauty. HB: Oh, so your saying I look like an alien? PUA: Yes. Yes, I am. Actually, I was hired by the government to find you. They said you escaped the lab. How’s you manage that? Maybe you can be my friend, like ET and I’ll hide you […]

 

Gay Cats Routine

Initial hook: Start the story with, “Have you ever met a gay cat?” PUA: Ok, get this, my friend Sara, bought 3 cats some time ago. I don’t know what she was thinking when she bought them, but she bought all three *male* cats. It was so funny. When I would go to her place […]

 

Mystery’s Seashell Opener

Mystery: [pulling a seashell from his pocket and holding it out in his open palm] Hey look at this. … Isn’t this awesome? … Isn’t it pretty? … Yeah my friends and I … went down to Santa Monica pier… and we found THIS… and it’s a KEEPSAKE. … Isn’t it pretty? – Mystery Related […]

 

80s Music Opener

PUA: Hey guys, this is driving us nuts, you know that song… “You spin me right round baby right round like a record baby right round round round…” Who sings that? Girls: [as they start to respond interrupt them and continue] PUA: I was talking to my friend the other day and she said it’s […]

 

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