PUA Openers

The best openers, stories, and banter lines collected from the world's greatest PUAs.

Banter Lines

You Seem Warm/Creepy Gambit

“You know, you come off as a warm person, but you really have a hard time letting people in, maybe even trusting people. I bet sometimes you feel like you don’t really connect with people. And for the most part l don’t like girls like yourself, but you have a friendly smile, so, maybe you […]

 

Sexual Predators Routine

Do you know that it is FEMALES, and not males, who are the only ones who have an organ in their body made SOLELY for sexual pleasure. And that organ has twice as many nerve endings as a man’s entire penis. And that organ has more nerve endings packed into a single small space than […]

 

Do you know why we would never get along?

Do you know why we would never get along? Because we’re too similar. You wont take my shit, and I wont take you shit and what fun is that? If I were in a room with myself for a while, I would pull all my hair out of my HEAD. So what I guess what […]

 

The Toys Routine

OMG … today I found my old toys in the basement at my little sisters house … well she’s 21 now but I call her my little sister … so she had all these barbies, and I had G.I. Joes … I remember when my sister would try to make them get married, and I […]

 

Cartoons Routine

OMG… this morning I saw the BEST shit EVER.. remember when you were a kid… what cartoons did you watch?? Well when I was a kid, we had He-Man, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and Transformers… and on TV this morning, they had new episodes with new animations of all of them… it was the […]

 

Drunk Girls Routine

Me: OMG, are you drunk? Her: Yes / No Yes: Me: Oh, HB, you make me sad! Her: Why? Me: You seem so sweet and nice, and I feel like we’d be super compatible… but you’re so drunk that this connection we have isn’t even REAL. I mean, do you think I’m cute? Do you […]

 

My Cheeks Are Hurting Routine

OMG my cheeks are hurting. We were laughing so hard, like, the WHOLE way over here. I’m actually sore from all the laughter. – Lovedrop No products found.

 

Alien Beauty Routine

PUA: You have a very other worldly beauty. HB: Oh, so your saying I look like an alien? PUA: Yes. Yes, I am. Actually, I was hired by the government to find you. They said you escaped the lab. How’s you manage that? Maybe you can be my friend, like ET and I’ll hide you […]

 

Don’t Laugh Gambit

PUA: ok here my little sister showed/told/taught me this just this morning.. I’m not good at it yet (or “not good at telling stories” if its a story), so don’t laugh OK?? I get really shy when girls laugh at me.. HBs: ok… PUA: (now give them the sweetest/cutest/funniest puppydog look *ever*, and just pause […]

 

Penis Implant Gambit

Yeah, I don’t mean to brag or anything but I got a bit of plastic surgery done, and it went really well. Yeah, well it cost a lot of money, but it was totally worth it. Well, it’s a secret. Ok. I got a penis implant. (Proudly with the feeling that you’re enormous now) I’m […]

 

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